Advisory: Please note that this post is about the Pulse nightclub massacre on June 12, 2016. It contains sensitive and difficult to read content.
Father Benjamin Lehnertz is a Roman Catholic priest of the diocese of Orlando. On Sunday June 12, 2016, he had finished his first mass, and parishioners were gathered in the narthex. They asked him if he had heard about the shooting at Pulse. This was the first he heard about it. That was about 25 minutes from where he lived. He visits people in the hospital right down the street from the nightclub. That hit close to home.
He then got a text from his brother who lives in Australia. Early in the day, the numbers were about 15 to 20 people dead, That number climbed through the day. It kept getting worst and worst. More details came from people throughout the morning as the 12:15 mass approached. The heaviness of it descended on the parish.
Benjamin lived in Colorado when Columbine happened. He was in middle school. He had learned how to brace for the news of a mass shooting. He thought to himself, “we are not going to let them make us scared.”
By the afternoon he was seated with this mother, and stepfather. he felt powerless and shell shocked. What could he do to help? A deacon called, and said, they needed Spanish speaking ministers. Benjamin knows enough Spanish to get by, he holds mass in Spanish, he can read Spanish.
So he and his parents went down to the Hampton Inn. They both have crisis management expertise in their backgrounds. There was a sea of people, many traumatized. Family were trying to find where their loved ones were. It is always better to know what you are dealing with. Questions weigh on people. That was a very unique scenario to walk into. It is not a scene he would ever want to revisit.
Organizationally it was a nightmare. There were plenty of counselors and plenty of ministers, deacons and priests. There were some confirmed deaths, and they were trying to notify family members. Someone was coordinating clergy. He had been to hospitals so he was familiar with breaking such news to family. It was a very slow process. The family would need to be identified and the brought to a room in the hotel where the news was forwarded. They would react as they needed.
Clergy huddled in the hallway. If the family had a catholic background then someone would come out and ask, “Can you come and be with us?” Over the course of three hours they saw like 3 families. He decided that waiting in the hallway was a waist of time so he went downstairs to see if people needed to talk. He sat with people who were crying or alone. His was there to listen and offer pastoral support. His parents did the same, they found one person and talked to them.
Late in the day he had to get back to the church for the evening mass. He left his car with his parents and had the deacon drive him back. The evenings homily was very different than the morning homily. The church was packed that night. He spoke from the heart. He asked all to pray for the families. For the first time he put his head in his hands and sobbed.
After mass his mom had driven back from the Hampton Inn. She hugged him an cried. She said, “Ben, it was so awful.” The room was full of people who had not been notified at the end of the day. Someone in a uniform stood up on a desk and said, “everyone be quiet and listen closely.” He then he proceeded to read a list of names. No one knew what that list was. Someone would hear their child’s name and they didn’t know weather to panic or be consoled. Chatter drowned out the announcement. People could not hear the names. Finally he announced that the names were people who were injured but survived the shooting. Staff from the hospital were outside. People who heard the name of a loved one were asked to exit the hotel. Hospital staff would give more information.
90% of the people remained in the room. They were told that there was no information about their loved ones. People were told to go to the Beardall Center the next day. Everyone walked out to a wall of news cameras and the worst question of their lives looming in their minds.